Many of us have heard the phrase "A self-fulfilling prophesy". But how does this phrase relate to our lives at menopause?
"Belief becomes biology"
"The world we have created is a product of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking."
These two quotes are at the beginning of a chapter in the book "Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom" by Christiane Northrup.
I wanted to share these words, because this is such an important idea.
I recently wrote a blog on 'Cultural Differences in Menopause', (read it here) and my research showed me that when women have different beliefs about what will happen in menopause, their experiences largely correlate to their expectations.
In the UK, Europe and America, as well as in many other western cultures, menopause is often depicted as an ending. The end of fertility, the end of beauty, the end of youth, the end of attractiveness even! And IF this is what we tell ourselves, and then we pass this belief to our daughters, how can we expect the menopause to be anything other than a trauma!
After spending the last month or so researching attitudes and beliefs about menopause, I have to tell anyone who will listen...
IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THIS WAY!!!!
Let us take our lead from cultures where menopause is celebrated as the emergence of a woman of experience and wisdom. A time when a woman can at last explore her sexuality without the risk of pregnancy, a time when women can embrace freedom to choose what is important to them, and to devote time to these things without guilt or conflict.
What we believe menopause to be, is how we are likely to experience it.
So what if we change what we believe?
Look for women who have experienced menopause positively. Look for women who have embraced their age after 40. Look for women who are thriving in their lives as they age.
And ask: How did they approach menopause? What attitudes did they carry through it? How much time did they devote to themselves and their own development in this stage of life?
There are so many beautiful older women, who seem to be living their best years in their 50's, 60's, 70's and beyond. It is no accident in most cases. These are so often women who have moved into middle and later years with a positive attitude and a belief that they can and should continue to thrive! But so much depends on what we believe, not only about ourselves, but also about our place as women in society!
My hope in my work with homeopathy from now on, is to help women find a place of confidence and joy from which to experience this phase of life, and to alleviate the suffering so many experience at menopause.
Menopause is a beginning! An adventure! A whole new lease of life!! Lets make it count!!